Let’s talk about the stage no one wants to admit they’re in—because it sounds like a failure.

👉 The “not ready yet” stage.

It’s not laziness. It’s not a character flaw. It’s a stage of the process—and it has its own rules.

👉 What “Not Ready Yet” really looks like

You might be in this stage if:

  • You know something should change… but you’re not planning to act right now

  • You avoid thinking about it because it feels heavy or exhausting

  • You minimize it (“It’s not that bad.”)

  • You feel defensive when the topic comes up

  • You keep saying, “I’ll deal with it later”

  • Part of you believes change will cost too much (time, energy, comfort, identity)

Sometimes “not ready” is simply your system saying:

I don’t feel like I have the resources to take this on.

👉 Why this stage actually makes sense

There are usually two reasons people stay here:

1. The change feels threatening
Threatening to your comfort, your routine, your relationships, your self-image, your time, your sense of control.

2. The change feels overwhelming
Your brain sees the whole mountain and says, “Nope.”
So you avoid. You distract. You delay.

That’s not weakness—it’s protection.

Here’s the key: you can’t force Action from this stage

This is where most people get stuck. They try to “motivate” themselves with pressure:

  • “I should be doing better.”

  • “What’s wrong with me?”

  • “I just need discipline.”

Pressure might create a short burst of action… but it rarely creates lasting change.
Because it doesn’t address the real issue: you’re not ready yet.

👉 So what does work?

What helps in the “Not Ready Yet” stage

Your job in this stage is not to overhaul your life. Your job is to build awareness + readiness.

  • Raise awareness (without judgment)
    Try this question:

    “If nothing changes, what will this cost me in 6 months?
    Not to scare yourself—just to get honest.

     

  • Connect to what you care about
    👉 Readiness grows when change connects to values.
    Ask:
“What do I want more of in my life?”
(energy, peace, confidence, connection, freedom, health, stability)

     

  • Find one “low-resistance” step
    In this stage, the best step is often a 2% change, not a life makeover.
    Examples:

    • drink one glass of water before coffee

    • schedule one appointment you’ve been avoiding

    • take a 5-minute walk

    • write one sentence: “I want to change ______ because ______.”

    • tell one person: “I’m thinking about working on this.”

💫 Small steps create safety. Safety creates readiness.

👉 A 60-second self-check (do this today)

Pick ONE change you’ve been avoiding.

  • What is the change? __________________________________

  • What is the real reason I’m not ready yet? (be honest)

    • overwhelmed

    • afraid of failing

    • afraid of what it will require

    • don’t know where to start

    • don’t feel supported

    • it threatens my comfort/identity

  • What is ONE low-resistance step I would do this week?

That’s your stage-appropriate next step.

In the next blog, I’ll cover the stage where most people live: Thinking About It– when you want to change, but part of you is still arguing with it.